Free fall

August 16, 2006 at 4:03 am (Fragments)

7/4/2006

So often I know my reasons -true reasons- for doing or not doing something, and more often than not it weighs me down. True reasons aren’t always the most noble or dignified ones. You bear with yourself, you bear with others, and you go on. Gradually, that cement bucket lets go of your legs, or you succumb to water and consider the free fall into the deep just another current. But I’m cursed. I see the answers in hesitation of others, the real reasons pulling the strings, so rarely do we confess it to ourselves. I see mine, I see others’ ,and it still weighs me down. Free fall is becoming something that I’d soon fight against. At one point, it wouldn’t matter how many buckets drag me down. I’ll have to enforce my own current. Free fall’s delusional elevation is over.

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